You’re so irritating. I can handle someone being shitty to my face, but I don’t have to, so why would I let someone disrespect me? Besides, he’s the little brat that got me banned from Catsanova…
[ So, like, it’s personal, okay? Jouno is out to make this kid’s life a living hell. ]
To be fair, you were being an asshole to that Cater kid. [ So, LIKE, the ban is justified. Sorry Jouno. ]
I disrespect you almost every other day, [ Maybe don't point that out, buddy, ] and you've never really punished me. Unless you count.... hm, okay, okay, I get it.
But, consider: what if I don't clean up. What if I make it worse.
That wasn’t my fault! [ Is that a pout in his voice? ]
Make it worse, and I’ll make an example of you in front of the newbie. [ But Dazai might enjoy that. Jouno wrinkles his nose in annoyance. ]
But ah— that, what you said earlier… brings up a good point. [ Jouno frowns for a moment, quiet for once. ] Well, no matter, I’m sure it won’t be a problem this year.
That's not really a punishment, you know. We haven't been able to do anything voyeuristic recently...! [ Dumbass was fully into it. He'd love to be made an example of. Little freak.
But there's also.... ]
Oh. Yeah, I was more meaning how you acted towards him when we went to the cafe together, but... [ It was coming to that time of year now, wasn't it? Already, a year since Dazai had been here with Jouno... ]
You're sure? Why's that? Do you have some plan to keep it from being a problem?
Nooo that's too cruel!!! You'd just neglect me just like that?! Wow!!!
[ Can you hear the even louder whine now?? Poor thing~ How could Jouno be so cruel to him!!! He's just a little guy!! And even after he spoiled him on his birthday?!? Rude!!!!!! ]
What is it, then? Your plan, I mean. Should tell me, in case you're planning on doing anything CRAZY.
I think it's pretty necessary to tell both of your subs what your plan is, don't you? What if you tried to hurt or get in a fight with Tetchou-san? Or, what if you did something you might regret to me? Not that there's much you could do that I'd be upset over, buuuuut....
[ Hm, what's another thing he can bring up? ]
or or or, what if you end up getting yourself in a situation where you end up hurt again? And we don't know where you are, what you're doing?
Oh, I will almost certainly be getting into a fight with Tetchou-san. [ That much was normal. They were at each other's throats more often than not, though less violently here than back home. ] And there's nothing I'd regret doing to you.
[ At least nothing that Jouno wanted to acknowledge now. ]
I hardly doubt you're genuinely concerned about what happens to me. Besides, even death is temporary here, so while I do not enjoy it, it's more a passing inconvenience than anything to be worried about.
[ Jouno sounds incredulous, and a little laugh escapes him. The entire idea is ridiculous — he hasn’t been on anything like a date in over 7 years. Being a Hunting Dog didn’t exactly lend time to frivolous activities like dating. He’s not sure he even remembers how to act on one. It’s all so… normal. ]
[ ... Can't be a bar, that's not really somewhere for a 'date', right? What about... ]
A little cafe. Somewhere with good food and drinks. Where we won't get accidentally drugged, mind you! Maybe somewhere quiet, where we can sit and enjoy the food without being annoyed by anyone around us??
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[ ........ Probably not. Ugh!!!! ]
Good job on that one. Couldn't handle someone being shitty to your face? What'd he even do to warrant a citation? Be more specific!
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[ So, like, it’s personal, okay? Jouno is out to make this kid’s life a living hell. ]
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I disrespect you almost every other day, [ Maybe don't point that out, buddy, ] and you've never really punished me. Unless you count.... hm, okay, okay, I get it.
But, consider: what if I don't clean up. What if I make it worse.
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Make it worse, and I’ll make an example of you in front of the newbie. [ But Dazai might enjoy that. Jouno wrinkles his nose in annoyance. ]
But ah— that, what you said earlier… brings up a good point. [ Jouno frowns for a moment, quiet for once. ] Well, no matter, I’m sure it won’t be a problem this year.
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But there's also.... ]
Oh. Yeah, I was more meaning how you acted towards him when we went to the cafe together, but... [ It was coming to that time of year now, wasn't it? Already, a year since Dazai had been here with Jouno... ]
You're sure? Why's that? Do you have some plan to keep it from being a problem?
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I’ll neglect you.
[ At least Dazai might wither away from lack of attention, then. ]
I don’t know what you mean. [ Jouno, pls… ]
Of course I have a plan.
[ He did not have a plan. ]
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[ Can you hear the even louder whine now?? Poor thing~ How could Jouno be so cruel to him!!! He's just a little guy!! And even after he spoiled him on his birthday?!? Rude!!!!!! ]
What is it, then? Your plan, I mean. Should tell me, in case you're planning on doing anything CRAZY.
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[ Jouno huffs, annoyed. He really doesn't know what he'll do -- what can he do if the very city itself works against him again? ]
I don't have to tell you.
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I think it's pretty necessary to tell both of your subs what your plan is, don't you? What if you tried to hurt or get in a fight with Tetchou-san? Or, what if you did something you might regret to me? Not that there's much you could do that I'd be upset over, buuuuut....
[ Hm, what's another thing he can bring up? ]
or or or, what if you end up getting yourself in a situation where you end up hurt again? And we don't know where you are, what you're doing?
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[ At least nothing that Jouno wanted to acknowledge now. ]
As touching as the concern is, I'll be fine.
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[ Way to try and guilt trip him, Dazai. Aren't you just the kindest..... ]
Not like I care if you get hurt, really! Don't take it that way at all, weirdo.
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I hardly doubt you're genuinely concerned about what happens to me. Besides, even death is temporary here, so while I do not enjoy it, it's more a passing inconvenience than anything to be worried about.
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[ Anyways, ]
Yeah, whatever, whatever! Forget I even mentioned anything then. Ugh, but I haven't even experienced death here yet! How's that fair????
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cw: suicide attempt mention
[ Why does Jouno think he's stopped attempting on his own life???? ]
Back on topic though. Do I really have to share my space with someone I don't know? Am I gonna be rewarded if I behave?
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[ There's a moment of silence as Jouno considers a reward. ]
I'm disinclined to reward you, but were I to change my mind -- what would you want?
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A date.
[ The answer comes easily, as if Dazai's thought about it before. ]
Nothing fancy. Just. A night where we can go out, do something fun, then come home. No expectations or really a plan needed!!
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[ Jouno sounds incredulous, and a little laugh escapes him. The entire idea is ridiculous — he hasn’t been on anything like a date in over 7 years. Being a Hunting Dog didn’t exactly lend time to frivolous activities like dating. He’s not sure he even remembers how to act on one. It’s all so… normal. ]
I’m not sure I’d make an ideal date, Dazai-san.
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[ Come on!! It's not something that deep!! ]
Does it matter if you're not the ideal date? I'm not either. That's why I want to try it just once with you. Doesn't have to be something we do again.
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Where would you take me?
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A little cafe. Somewhere with good food and drinks. Where we won't get accidentally drugged, mind you! Maybe somewhere quiet, where we can sit and enjoy the food without being annoyed by anyone around us??
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[ See, Jouno, he can be a good boy~ All he needs is a little nudge in the right direction! ]
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